Are You Afraid of the Dark? Season 5 Episode 9: The Tale of the Unexpected Visitor

“No fool about house guests”- Kiki

Well I only have five episodes left to review for the original run, but tonight we are in for a treat as our homegirl, Kiki tells us about the horrors of having unexpected house guests in her tale, The Tale of the Unexpected Visitor.

The night starts off with Kiki asleep on the storyteller’s chair.

“’cause I’m dreaming of you tonight…” Selena

The Gary love triangle walks into the campfire, Sam walks over and says “What’s up with her?” Tucker then walks over and has a mysterious smile on his face and replies “shh she’s sleeping.”

“Do you think she’ dead?” Sam

Stig shows up with the water bucket and says “It’s nice and warm. Let’s stick her hand in it and see if…” Encase you do not know what Stig is talking about if you put a sleeping person’s hand in a bucket of warm water, they will be so relaxed they will piss on themselves. This is what he is trying to accomplish with Kiki.

“Let me do it.” The Gary

But alas The Gary stops Stig. During the commotion, Kiki wakes up. She asks them when they arrived. Betty Ann tells her “Just now, why are you so tired?”  She obviously thinks her friend might be suffering from sleep apnea. Kiki replies “I haven’t gotten any sleep in 3 days. Aunt Stephanie is in town.” Sam kind of smirks and says “The snoring machine.”  But Kiki is always one to make lemonade out of lemons and tonight is no exception.

“Bruh I haven’t slept in 3 days.”- Kiki

Kiki tells the gang, “Well at least I got a story out of it.” Tucker is kind of slow and says ” You have a story about a snoring aunt?” Kiki who is sleep deprived fires back “No fool, about house guests. It’s fun having visitors, but when you invite someone over, you’d better make sure you know what you’re getting into, ’cause even a cool visitor can overstay there welcome. But there’s another kind of guest. The kind that comes by surprise. The kind that comes unwanted, and totally unexpected. That’s the worst kind, and in my story, there’s a guest who won’t leave until it gets what it wants. Kiki then submits her story as The Tale of the Unexpected Visitor

We are introduced to two friends Perch and Jeff. Perch is the one with longish blonde hair who sounds like a surfer and Jeff looks like a conservative late for a Republican caucus.  Kiki narrates ” Jeff and Perch were best friends who decided to form a band and write music. The only problem was they had different ideas about what good music was.”

This is Perch. He kind of looks like Dana from Step by Step
This is Jeff. He was attacked by water demons

Eventually, they go down to the basement as Jeff’s house, where they get on Jeff’s dad’s computer. I think they are downloading a concert or a video game. Perch them stumbles upon Jeff’s dad’s work papers and see something called The Peabody Project. This makes Jeff freak out and he says that if his dad finds out they were downstairs he is dead. Perch then asks what the project is and Jeff tells him it has to do with deep space communication. Perch makes a joke about calling up captain Kirk much to the annoyance of Jeff and the viewers.

The basement full of computers, pre to catch a pedophile days

They disturbed by Jeff’s younger brother Bobby and Montana the dog. Jeff runs upstairs to see this:

Why U no play with me?

Jeff gets blackmailed into making Bobby a banana split. Meanwhile, Perch is downstairs doing exactly what he isn’t supposed to be doing. He opens up the Peabody project on the computer. At first, it doesn’t appear to be working as it is a bunch of flashing binary code. But then it finally gets to the project menu. Perch follows the instructions, for once in his life, which instructs him to enter coordinates to aim the satellite at. Perch doesn’t know any coordinates and just put in some random numbers that happen to hit a planet in the distant universe. Next, it tells him to input a message, this kind stresses him out as he doesn’t know what to send. Until he hits the music keyboard with his hands. He plays a couple of notes and sends that as his message.

Well every artist has to start somewhere

Everything seems okay until Perch receives an incoming message from the planet in response to his.

message recieved
This is not Nirvana man

This sends Jeff running downstairs to reprimand Perch. Jeff yells at Perch, to which tells Jeff he made a call and what they heard was the answer-back. Later on, Jeff’s parents come back home. If you recognize his dad, it is because he played Raymond from the tale of the 13th floor, he isn’t playing an alien here, or at least I am almost certain he isn’t. They both tell Jeff they are disappointed with him, Jeff assumes they are talking about being in the basement and almost confesses to them, when his brother walks in and his mother says something about ice cream and how Bobby won’t go to sleep now.

T-ball trials were last week..,

That night there is a glowing orb in the sky that makes Montana the dog go outside. The dog gets captured in a golden spider web. When the dog gets taken, there is a tone that is being played. Montana doesn’t seem to panic so maybe he doesn’t like Jeff’s family. The next day Jeff’s mom mentions that she hasn’t seen Montana in a while as she rushes off to some banquet being thrown for her husband. This makes Jeff and Perch go in search of Montana. Bobby wants to join, but he will only slow them down, so Jeff tells him to stay back encase Montana comes back. Bobby starts to play t-ball by himself and hits the ball into the woods. When he goes to fetch the ball, Bobby gets kidnapped by the same gold glowing spider web as Montana.

Hug it out boy, hug it out.

Jeff then starts to yell out for Montana, only he hears his own voice yelling back at him. He gets frustrated and yells that it is not funny. Eventually, Jeff and Perch stumble upon a metal door in the woods. The door opens and Jeff throws Montana’s ball into it, which causes the door to disappear. The door later reappears to throw back the ball at Jeff and Perch.

door in woods
whoa a shiny metal door

This causes both boys to run down into the basement, where the Peabody project is still running, and they see the screen which displays this:

You’ve got mail

Jeff panics and tells Perch to go find Bobby and that he will contact his dad on his cellular. As Perch searches for Bobby around the house, he too gets taken in a golden spider web.

“This acid is phenomenal”- Perch

Jeff runs outside to go inside the door, Jeff is also nearly captured but manages to escape. Once inside the spaceship, Perch tells Jeff “it’s music, Jeff. They do everything intones. If you play a D-sharp, the tubes will open.” Jeff repeats what Perch tells him and runs back into the house.

in tubes
It’s the D-sharps

Once inside the house, Jeff uses the keyboard to play a D-sharp and records it on to his tape recorder. Afterward, he runs back to the spaceship and plays the note freeing, Bobby, Montana, and Perch.

Once they are outside they are surrounded by glowing nets, but after a flash of light from another spaceship, they all disappear. The boys are then approached by two figures made of light.

We are family

The taller figure speaks to them and says “I’ve come to take my child home. He came to your planet when he heard your message, in our language, that means we are toys. He came to play with toys.” The kid then talks in the tone from earlier and the mother continues “That means I’ve come to play.” Perch then says “We are not toys, lady we are people.” The mother says “I’m sorry. We will leave you now. Please don’t think badly of my son. He only came to play.” Then they leave as Jeff’s parents come home.

Kiki ends the story by narrating “The guys didn’t get into trouble because Jeff’s dad was so happy that the Peabody Project actually worked. As for their songwriting, Jeff and Perch finally found something interesting to write about. And they played their song for the first time to a very special audience.”

“We are not toys” Jeff and Perch

Kiki then says “The End.” The gang then congratulates her on a great story as The Gary declares the meeting over.

As The Gary puts out the fire Kiki approaches Sam and says “Hey Sam could I sleep over tonight?” Sam says “Uh sorry my parents are painting. The place is a mess.

“I snuck out of the house and my parents don’t know I have friends.”- Sam

Then Kiki turns to Betty Ann, who says “Sorry my cousin’s already sleeping over.” Betty Ann must be a bad host to ditch her cousin to go tells stories in the Canadian wilderness at night instead of watching movies.

“Why didn’t you ask me before Sam?”- Betty Ann

Next Kiki asks The Gary and Tucker, The Gary response with “My dad snores worse than your aunt guaranteed.” Tucker adds “Yeah he keeps me up too.”

“Uh, we aren’t allowed to have girls over.”- The Gary and Tucker

Kiki then says “Ah gotta find a…” but her last resort is Stig.

“Am I that desperate yet?”- Kiki

“Give me a chance”- Stig

Moira’s thoughts:

Overall this is an enjoyable episode. The song Jeff and Perch wrote is one of those stupid songs that is bound to get stuck in your head, with simple repeating lyrics of “We are not toys”.

  1. I liked the premise of how Kiki came up with this story.
  2. I am glad this is not Kiki’s last story.
  3. I found it odd she would ask to stay at Sam’s house before asking Betty Ann as she has known Betty Ann longer.
  4. I wonder if Betty Ann told her cousin where she was going or if she planned a late night sleepover.
  5. Why did The Gary and Tucker look so nervous about having Kiki stay over? Secret Crush?
  6. We never find out if she stays with Stig or decides to go home. I wish this would have been addressed in the next episode.

So let’s give it up for our girl Kiki, who I hope finally has gotten some sleep. Next up is our girl Kiki again with her last tale of Season five, a personal favorite of mine. The tale of the Vacant Lot. Once again this has been Kiki and her tale of unwelcomed houseguests in The Tale of the Unexpected Visitor

So until next time…..Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society I call this story: The tale of Moira’s Afraid of the Dark? (But not really) Blog number 9 of season 5.

Only three more to go! When the next one happens nobody knows!

I  would like to interview *cough*Ross Hull or Raine Pare-Coull or Jodie Resther, *cough* I feel that if enough people tweet at them or Facebook them, and let them know about this blog, it can happen! Let’s make my dream come true!

Photo credit: Unexpected Visitor


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